It can be a shock hearing that your girlfriend wants to have an open relationship especially if you thought your relationship was in a good place.
The simple truth is your girlfriend wants to have an open relationship simply because she is not satisfied with the nature of your current relationship.
This doesn’t necessarily mean you are a bad partner. It means your relationship is lacking something that she needs and to attain it, she’s willing to look somewhere else but doesn’t want to lose you either.
This can be difficult to hear especially if you are the kind of person that prefers a traditional monogamous relationship. It is not Something that’s easy to understand or even adopt. For most couples, this is the beginning of the end of the relationship.
If your girlfriend is inquiring about the idea of an open relationship it usually means she has been thinking about it for a while. It also means there’s something missing in your relationship that she feels you are both unable to rectify.
The idea of an open relationship can be very difficult to understand. On one hand, someone is suggesting you’re not enough for them, and on the other, they don’t want to let you go either.
It can seem very selfish, uncompromising and is usually for open-minded people who do not mind exploring the idea.
Table of Contents
Reasons As To Why Your girlfriend Wants An Open Relationship.
- Different interests.
- Mismatched libidos.
- Open to the relationships.
- Absence of intimacy in the relationship.
- Change in sexuality.
- Long-distance relationship.
- She requires too much attention.
- She is not fully satisfied.
- Broken relationship with a shared interest.
Develop different interests.
Most relationships usually start off on the same page and with a lot of compromising. But as time goes on people change and interests develop and sometimes on different paths. It is not uncommon to find yourself in a relationship with someone you love but with very little shared interests.
If this is the case your girlfriend might be open to the idea of having an open relationship just to have someone share that part of her life with. She feels there’s an intimate connection missing that she desires.
Being with Someone for a long time means you understand them better. It is for this reason that it becomes unfair to ask them to get involved in things you know they have no interest in. This is why the idea of having two people Seems like a good solution to this problem.
Long-distance Relationship
If you find yourself in a relationship that requires you to remain separate for extended periods of time, then this might explain why your girlfriend wants an open relationship.
We all seek out relationships with the idea of sharing our lives with someone. You want to do things together, discover new experiences, and create new Memories.
This becomes difficult if you both can not remain in the same place. There are many reasons why people are forced to live separately for example family, work or education.
For this reason, having an open relationship might help fill the void for both of you. It allows you to remain in each other’s lives while eliminating the burden of being lonely and alone.
Mismatched libidos.
If you and your partner have different sexual needs and desires then it might also explain why she is considering the idea of an open relationship.
Everyone is different and some people need more sexual intimacy and attention than others. If you find yourself in a relationship where your partner suddenly doesn’t want to have as much sex. This can leave you very dissatisfied, frustrated, and unhappy.
Over time some people might prioritize having an emotional connection over physical desires. And for such a couple having an open relationship might be the answer to their problem.
It ensures that everyone’s needs are attended to and leaves everyone fulfilled.
Open to the relationships.
If someone has always had multiple partners it can be difficult to get used to the idea of committing to just one person.
For people that come from a background of polyamory and polygamous relationships having an open relationship seems like such a normal idea.
So your partner may be exploring the idea of having an open relationship because it is not a new concept to her and allows that freedom of expression.
Having multiple partners also allows you to explore more with someone close to you and it’s empowering to be able to do what you want to have a fulfilled life.
Absence of intimacy in the relationship.
If you are in a relationship that lacks intimacy it can be very difficult for one partner. Some people require this form of attention to feel loved and appreciated.
This is why it can be very difficult when your partner doesn’t express this level of affection.
It is also important to remember that having sex is not the same as having intimacy in your relationship. Intimacy extends far more than sex and it allows a relationship to grow on an emotional level.
If one of you is unable to provide this level of intimacy that your partner requires, having an open relationship might be the answer.
It allows you to find someone with whom you can be intimate and share that part of yourself, therefore, feeling happy and fulfilled.
Change in Sexuality.
If during the course of your long-term relationship one of you discovers a change in their sexuality then this might explain why having an open relationship will suit you as a couple.
People usually discover themselves at different stages in life. And if at some point on your journey you or your partner discover a change in sexuality for example one of you is bisexual, then it might make sense to have an open relationship.
It allows someone you love to explore themselves in order to find happiness and freedom. It also shows great support and understanding in allowing someone close to you to grow.
Having an opening relationship is not always about satisfying a physical need or emotional void in your relationship. It is also about supporting someone you love and allowing them to grow.
She requires too much attention.
If someone requires more attention than you can give then sharing the responsibility might not be such a bad idea. Open relationships exist for different reasons for different people.
For some couples, having an open relationship actually brings them closer together. And for others, it works far better than they ever thought it could once they are open to the idea.
If your partner develops into someone that requires far more than you can physically, emotionally, or intellectually provide. Then having this level of freedom in your relationship might actually save it.
Broken relationship with a shared interest.
They are several couples that remain together simply out of responsibility with very little emotional connection. For example, some people might choose to remain together because their financial situation doesn’t allow them to move on separately or because they have family commitments, for example, children.
In an effort to keep the family together they sacrifice their own happiness even when they are no longer compatible with each other.
In such a situation having an open relationship might suit this couple’s needs. It allows them to maintain a happy home for their children while at the same time enjoying a different relationship.
It’s a compromise that allows them to achieve an emotional connection with someone else and maintain a physical relationship with each other or other people while keeping their family intact.
What to Do if your girlfriend wants an open relationship.
- Understand the nature of the relationship.
- Evaluate your individual needs.
- Set boundaries.
- Consider your commitment to such a relationship.
- Try to understand each other’s needs.
- Try to understand the responsibility that comes with such a relationship.
- Consider the pros and cons of being in an open relationship.
- Consider the state of your relationship.
- Know when to get out.
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Conclusion.
Before getting into an open relationship it is very important to understand the kind of commitment and responsibility you are taking on.
It requires twice as much time and twice as much work in order to function.
For some people, an open relationship can work quite well while others can not entertain the idea. So you have to find out what works for you as a couple.
I hope you enjoyed reading this article.
Truly Yours.
